


Al Fine

by MidoriKurenaiYume



Series: Overture [2]
Category: Fate/Zero, Fate/stay night & Related Fandoms
Genre: Alternate Universe, Betaed, Established Relationship, F/M, Group chat, Online Conversations, Parody, Slight discussions, Some Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-26
Updated: 2017-06-26
Packaged: 2018-11-19 08:27:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11309577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MidoriKurenaiYume/pseuds/MidoriKurenaiYume
Summary: Rider doesn't take well what happened with the previous group chat, so he creates another one.(sequel to Intermezzo)





	Al Fine

**Author's Note:**

> Thought to add something to the previous one-shot :P  
> Heartfelt thanks to MimiBlue for her kind beta work :D
> 
> Title: from another simple yet lovely Kalafina song ;)) (it's in the album 'Consolation')  
> Again, everyone's name is written as forename-surname.

…

...

Rider: Welcome to the new and improved group, folks! For some reason the number of Berserker’s Master is no longer existent, and thus I couldn’t add him, but I’m sure it won’t be a problem!

Berserker: Growwwwwwwl!

Archer: …You added me to a chat full of rabid dogs, _again_ _?_ You have some nerve, Rider.

Irisviel von Einzbern: Saber, where are you?

Irisviel von Einzbern: Saber! SABER! Where are you?

Irisviel von Einzbern: Kiritsugu, summon her please!

Kiritsugu Emiya: No.

Kayneth El-Melloi Archibald: Although clever, saving Command Spells won’t make you win the war.

Kirei Kotomine: Not having any is probably equally destined to bring you failure.

Sola-Ui Nuada-Re Sophia-Ri: …you have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about, priest.

Irisviel von Einzbern: Saber…? Saber, where are you?

Lancer: Given that she is about to get married, she might be with her fiancée at the moment.

Tokiomi Tohsaka: …if there was another Servant in my house, I would know.

Waver Velvet: …Wait, are you saying that Saber has gone _missing_ …?

Archer: WHERE IS MY QUEEN, YOU UNWORTHY MONGRELS!

Rider: Queen already? Did I miss the wedding? Was I not invited?!

Saber: Irisviel, I will be there in a moment, I’m on my way. Gilgamesh, calm down, this modern device’s battery needed to be recharged and I couldn’t use it. Rider – for the last time, I am _not_ married!

Holy Grail: …you now call him Gilgamesh in front of everyone. What a lovely day this is.

Tokiomi Tohsaka: Wait, what is the _Holy Grail_ doing here?

Irisviel von Einzbern: I… can’t… I don’t understand.

Lancer: …the Grail…?

Holy Grail: Peek-a-boo! I’ve always been here, I’m the prize after all. But I’m more interested in the relationship between Saber and Archer. I know it will give prolific results.

Waver Velvet: …………… _prolific?_

Lancer: Is this… does this imply… could it be that the King of Knights is _expecting_ _?_

Irisviel von Einzbern: Saber is PREGNANT?!?

Ryuunosuke Uryuu: Children?

Assassin: Heroic Spirits _cannot_ get pregnant!

Holy Grail: Interesting…

Saber: I am _not_ _!_ This whole discussion doesn’t make any sense!

Caster: JEANNE!!!

Rider: I _knew_ that creating this new group chat was a terrific idea! Now news and information can travel much faster! And what’s best, you won’t be able to control _this_ group, Archer!

Berserker: Growl, growl, grooooooowl!

Archer: If I am to be part of this ridiculous, vacuous and asinine group chat, I will be purging it of all the mongrels, and no one shall stop me.

_ Archer _ _has removed Berserker_

Waver Velvet: …Rider, please stop miscalculating…

Archer: Clinging to impossible optimism shall however be allowed. It’s, after all, entertaining to watch.

_ Archer _ _has removed Rider and Waver Velvet_

Irisviel von Einzbern: What about the Holy Grail? And Saber’s pregnancy?

Saber: …Irisviel. I am _not_ pregnant.

Kayneth El-Melloi Archibald: Lancer! The Grail!

Archer: Tch. I will not have that filthy cup interfere.

_ Archer _ _has destroyed the Holy Grail_

Sola-Ui Nuada-Re Sophia-Ri: …how is this possible– what happened?!?

Tokiomi Tohsaka: My King, I have no choice but to intervene. This is enough. Please retire for today. It’s not an order of course, it’s a request, for I ask not your submissiveness, but merely your respect, as your Master.

Archer: Being presumptuous enough to assume that you have the right to make a request in the first place is what proves your unworthiness beyond any possible doubt.

_ Archer _ _has removed Tokiomi Tohsaka_

Irisviel von Einzbern: Since I will probably be removed next, see you soon, Saber! I’d like to have tea with you together with a long chat, as you probably have lots to tell me ;) :P ;)

Saber: …I will be there in a few minutes, Irisviel.

_ Archer _ _has removed Irisviel von Einzbern and Kiritsugu Emiya_

Lancer: Master, this development was unforeseen, and now the delicate conditions of the King of Knights…

Saber: Lancer, please do not take after Rider’s example. There is no pregnancy, nor will there ever be.

Ryuunosuke Uryuu: No children?

Caster: Jeanne! No! You are not to be away from me! My Holy Virgin shall only be _mine_ _!_

_ Archer _ _has KILLED Caster and Ryuunosuke Uryuu. Slowly._

Kirei Kotomine: …this situation is, for lack of better words, unusual.

_ Archer _ _has removed Assassin and Kirei Kotomine_

Archer: You other mongrels have tasted my patience far too much.

_ Archer _ _has removed Lancer, Sola-Ui Nuada-Re Sophia-Ri and Kayneth El-Melloi Archibald_

Archer: I’m done with those lowly beings. I will only have my precious queen.

Saber: Considering that you don’t have one, that seems a rather lonely prospect.

Archer: Cynical sarcasm doesn’t become you, Arturia. You know perfectly well that the only person worthy of being my queen is _you_.

Saber: And as long as you don’t accept to become the same for me, we don’t have an agreement.

Holy Grail in spiritual form: Such a pity that you destroyed me, I would have _loved_ to see this discussion unfold.

...

…

_Yes, the Holy Grail is a gossip._

…

...

End

(for real this time)


End file.
